She dropped a coin into the cup.

I am wowed at the effect this has. i need to start running. i wish i could remember this feeling; but it will come and go like a cold breeze. that is stupid. HAHAHAHA she was born in spring. i am just typing what ever i think and than we can sort out all the rest in the end. i miss talking to my brother. i haven't talked with him since a long time. i wish we were not fighting. i don't want to waste any more time. i guess i could send him an email or something; but then he would win. i need to go to sleep. i wish this was published. i feel that if this was published, i would care more. i would mind to blog. not forget. i like this, i want people to see. i think they would care. they wouldn't mind to check in. 

i get sad when i think of everything.

I used to care, but things have changed

So here is the deal. I am out of friends. I woke up the other morning and realized that the friends I have are no longer what they once were. I wish this was not true, but I see no way around it. In the last few years me and mine have done much to be, who we want to be, for them. They have done nothing. My sons birthday was the other day and not one call, email or present. Mine and my wife's are in the next few weeks to come. I bet they will go unnoticed. 

I realized that friends, the ones you consider best, should remember these things. Are we old friends that only have the old in common? I think so. This makes me sad. I wish it was different.

When my son was born, nobody came. I am starting to believe that if we did not go see them, they still, to this day, would not have met gray. This makes me extremely sad. 

Nobody reads this so I do not care. I figure one day, when I die, they may go through this and see what I see. They will feel what I felt and think what I think. They will miss it for now.

High, not hi

There are moments of genius where I realize how great we are. I know where I have been and where we are going. This one is my favorite. Nobody will ever read or ever know; because this will be overlooked by all, even myself. I complain to much. I hate how I make her feel, she is wonderfull.

I cannot wait for tomorrow. that is a very first in a long time. I am lost. I a venture of weakness and despair. We dance and wonder where this destany bring us. What is the next step and when do we leave. I want to come back and see my togethers....

Yesterday, Today and Tomorrow are all in a room...

I am going to start some writing exercises soon. A few that interest me are as such; you find something that means something, or something that doesn't. Something you regret, or something that you feel. Something you dream. something you watch. Something that hurts, something that hurts. Or something that hurts. You take this "something" and you start to add. You type. You start with a phrase like "because..." and you type about this "something" just without ever mentioning the something. I want to see how far i can get, how far t takes me.

Another is free writing about things you hate separated by things you enjoy. And lastly, you write with all maybes. Maybe you can, maybe you cant. Maybe she knows. maybe you do. I will start to do these and post my results. Maybe I can figure it out, because maybe, you can figure me out. 

Another

You know what pisses me off about this country? Well, I will tell you then. How stupid people are. Lets take, for example, the political race between Obama and McCain. Everyone is making a big stink about who the running mates will be....fuck you!!!! Just pick who you want and who you think would be the best vice...NOT who you and your advisors think the people will like. We care more about the popularity of this shit than what and how they can change this piss poor country.

 

I don't get it. I don't get how people are so blind. They just bend over and get fucked in the ass, but at least your getting fucked by a handsome person that speaks well. I want to get out of this fake, inconsistent corporate country

Bring it on Home to me

Well Aimee left for St. louis today and I am lonely as hell. I forgot how lonely it is without her. I went to the mall, Starbucks, the book store and cleaned the shit out of the house; now I have nothing left to do and am getting depressed. I wish I were with her. It is really weird, I love to be alone, but only when she is not too far away.

All Dreams are made out of Real Things

It is sad to think that not one person reads this blog. I know I do not write all that well but it would be nice to see at least one person cares what i like to write about. Most of my close friends know that I have a blog, but none have ever asked for the address. Why is this? Is it because I am quite negative in my writings? Is it because they don't give a fuck what I think or feel? I suspect a mixture of both, but mostly the later. 

Why, when I am high, do I see everything that I hate about myself? I see the lazy, bored, unfocused and sick person I can be. My body aches. My ears ring and my mouth is dry. I cannot stand it, it worries me. I see all the failures in my life and i cannot figure out if those so called failures are real or not. Is it my subconscious showing me the changes I need to make, or am I just high as fuck?

A great song: Beck, True Love will find you in the End (a Daniel Johnston cover) 

An even better song: Wycleaf Jean, If I was President

Go download them both and play them at the same time backwards. Also, since nobody reads this blog I can say things like, vaginas scare me, and it isn't weird.

Piss Piss, Bang Bang

If I have said it once, I have said it a million times; NEVER, fly US Airways. HA, I said it, now stop feeding them your money. They are a horrible company with even worse costumer service. And just when I thought this fuck of a cunt company can not go out of business any quicker, they surprise me with an even dumber idea and unbelievable, ridiculous policies that push flyers to travel other airlines. This airline almost seems to want to self destruct. 

Fly Southwest, Frontier or ANY other airline other than this turd of an airline. Pay more for your  tickets and send US Airways your receipts so they know how bad business interests, policies and horrible costumer service effects them. 

Starbucks, Zappos and Google has this shit figured out. They treat their employees right and they "know" that it pays off. 

When will Americans get off their fat stupid lazy ass's and take their country back. America is falling apart and loosing. Yes, loosing everything; news flash, who gives a fuck about Iraq. The dollar sucks and the government(if that is what you want to call it) is fucking your ass and you thank them. For what? Why do americans, rich or poor; happy or sad, east or west and even fucked or...well, un-fucked put up with this?

Lets take list...

Healthcare? ...ya, its great(sarcasm)

Dollar? ...sucks

Technology? ...what is that?

Real Estate? .... who knows?

Energy? ...lets not get started

Education? ...do I need to say more?

Opportunity? ...do you really think you have this?

Crime? ...LOL

An Illusion of Greatness? ...Yup, we sure have that.

Look at what we are and piss on it. Stand up and be somebody. We seem to have run out of people who want to change. Speak! Take back your streets and challenge your local government to be on "our" side. 

Fuck you, fuck me and fuck them. Lets watch it all burn and go out with a bang.

All my Friends, and all my Lovers...

Tron,

If you could have a theme song play every time you walk into a room, what would you have?

Sincerely,

Danny

Dear Danny,

Great question. If I had to choose a song I would choose Curtis Mayfield's Pusherman. Not so much because the song is all that great; I mean, it is a pretty sweet song but, mainly because I feel that if that were my theme song,porno would just start breaking out all over the place. for example, if I were at a fancy restaurant and my wife had fancy shoes on, the waitress would say, "what can I get for you?" But before I could even muster up the breath to order the Chicken, she would whip out one of her breasts and start making out with my wife while saying, "This is our daily special, may I get you a double order?" Trust me, This type of shit would happen all the time if Pusherman was my theme song. 

The weird thing about the dinner sex is that all of the other customers in the restaurant would not be upset or disgusted to see my naked fat ass. Maybe it was the way I was brought up, but I really feel like that the dinner sex would cause a mass session of masturbation. Yup, everyone in the restaurant, including the kitchen manager would start masturbating. It would be great!

That would be my song, no doubts about it. Work, dinner, traffic and the grocery store would all be much cooler with this song in the background.

Broken Glass, Broken Hungry, Broken Hearts and Broken Bones

“I’m a new soul. I came to this strange world hoping I could learn a bit ’bout how to give and take. But since I came here felt the joy and the fear, finding myself making every possible mistake.”

I think I am starting to understand why some people join religions. Maybe I am being to generous and giving to much credit to human beings, but I would like to think that a large amount of people who join silly religions, cults and support groups are people who are just looking for something to be apart of. Nothing more, nothing less.

Life gets lonely. I was once asked why I do not believe in god, and they went on to ask, "doesn't it get lonely to have no purpose?" I responded then, with what I would still respond with today; once you get passed the idea that there is no point to life and we are no more important than a dried up wad of bubble gum under a picnic table; it is actually quite freeing.

There are no rules. There is nobody to impress. There are no standards you are trying to live up to. You are free to determine what feels good and what doesn't. There is nobody judging you. You get to just live your life.

But at the same time, we start to realize that we are who we are and we are not apart of something special. We are lonely, lesson less beings without a purpose. Once you accept this, the need for a purpose seems to somewhat fade away.

But Lately, things have been different in terms of wanting to be apart of something. It seems like everything had gotten mundane. There are no movements, no changes, no push to become better. The direction our country is going and the direction the world is going is quite scary. Along with the direction, I feel I am going.

But I digress. My point is that I have recently missed the blinders that these silly beliefs came with. Having these beliefs(as silly and unbelievable they are) means being apart of something.

In a recent post regarding the Jewish faith, The blogger for the nogodblogposed the question, "Would you give up religion if it meant you had to start paying taxes?" He discussed how in Israel there are Secular and Haredi Jews and the Haredi are given special privileges; one of which is no taxes.

To walk away from the religion means truth, but also a new perception of everything known. Along with taxes, you have to deal with knowing life will end, and there is no point.

Is this better than blinders? Would you rather see the truth or be trapped in the matrix?

Stomp on the Floor

Sure, I have learned a few things. I have learned to ride a bike. I learned to dance, to read, to walk and crawl. I have learned to speak, whisper and scream. But above that, I have learned when to do the right thing.  I learned things that took me even longer to unlearn, and from time to time, I learned what others didn't want me to learn. I have learned to do things in my own special way. I learned young and I learned away. I learn here and I learn there and I learn it all alone.

A Bright Blue Sky

Two songs to download; Chris Cornell's acoustic cover of Billy Jean and MIA's, Paper planes. They are the shit. Why haven't you started downloading them yet? I wish I could play songs on my blog. Is that possible? Who knows how to do shit like that? I want to say sorry to the three people that read this that I haven't blogged more this week. I did make some changes, I want to avoid heat from that fat cunt bag and her husband. Stay tuned, I will post more. Need advise?

The End is Near

It would be safe to say that at one point in everyones life, they have taken a ride with their father. Even this guy. Everyone has sat in the old pick truck up with their dad and went to the market or the movies, or even a sporting event. Everyone has, even this guy. Every kid played catch with their dad and I would guess at some point every kid helped their dad get the BBQ ready. Even this guy. Every boy has had 'the birds and the bees' talk from their old man in one way or another; everyone, even this guy. Yup, thats right, even this guy.

Most of the time I drive somewhere with my dad we seem to talk about the weather, crime or sports. Most of the time we talk about insignificant things that we can forget about shortly after the ride. Not this guy. This guy recently had a talk with his father that he will most definitely never forget. Ever. No amount of counseling will make him forget.

On February 19th, 2008 this guy and his father, Jack Berry, were moving sheep. Apparently they were taking the sheep to another canyon. I guess this is something people often do when they own sheep. I would assume it started just like any other drive. I would guess they had the windows down and they listened to the radio. I would guess they often checked on the sheep and I would also guess they probably both ate ham and cheese sandwich's while they drank Dr. Peppers.

With the wind in their hair and sheep in their hearts, they probably talked about many different subjects. I would hope that one of the subjects they discussed was school. I bet they did. I bet Jack asked Jeremiah how his grades were and what his plans were for college. I am sure they talked about how he was struggling in algebra. I am also sure his father Jack lectured him about the importance of doing well in all subjects so he can maintain a high GPA so he can get into a good college. I am sure they talked about college for a while.

Then at one point, Jack Berry turned to his son, Jeremiah, and said, "I’ve been told by God that you need to get a sex change and become my wife."

WHOA, what!!!!! I would think that not only was this a bit off topic, it was also quite inappropriate.

You generally do not tell people these type of things. I can think of a thousand other things that he could have said that would have been a perfect replacement. things like,

Man, this song sucks.

Hey son, are you getting hungry.

Looks like it may rain.(while pointing at the storm clouds)

and even...

Why the fuck are we transporting sheep?

But Jack chose to go with his gut and he said the top ranked statement of things not to say when you are in a truck with your son. He told his son that god wants him to chop of his penis and marry him. Then, according to Jeremiah, Jack raped him. Right then and there, Jack raped his son.

Maybe it was how I was brought up, but I have always looked at rape as a bad thing. I mean I can almost remember my dad sitting me down and saying, "Son, when all else fails, you just do not rape people. Especially a relative. Especially your son." Obviously, Jack never got this talk. Because he raped his son.

It is reported that Jack also told Jeremiah that if he ever told anyone he would kill their entire family and that he wants to take Jeremiah into the mountains to make him his girlfriend. I find this strange because he clearly already made him his girlfriend with an old school family style raping. But according to the police, that is how Jeremiah remembered it.

To make a long story short, later that day Jeremiah pulled out his pistol and shot his father Jack in the back of the head. After shooting him he pulled out a knife and stabbed him 199 times. He stopped at 199 because frankly, 200 is just too much. Jeremiah then used an ax to dismember his father. Head, legs and arms just had to go. Then using his knife he completely skinned his father and apparently fed the skin to coyotes. I also find this extremely hard to believe because feeding animals is against the law.

So Next time you are taking a ride with your son. Don't tell him that you want him to have a vagina so you can marry him. Just talk about college and stick with the conversation; do not drift from it.